I haven't much felt like writing in here recently. I made a stuffed dragon instead. He breaths fire constantly. The truth is, I named myself 'not a cancer patient' in these pages because I don't want to be one. I want to live my life as if cancer has nothing to do with it. I want to get chemo and radiation and go about the rest of my life as a 27 year old enjoying the crisp winter air. That's what this blog is supposed to be about. I don't care about the gorey details anymore (though I will note the irony that I am suddenly moved to post something here on the same day I got an IV placed in my left hand, making typing quite awkward). I've been through all these symptoms before, I seem to have a slightly improved cocktail of drugs this time. (Though I will complain that I threw up on my slippers tonight, and had to throw them out.)
So the thing is, I haven't been writing because I feel like a hospital patient. That's not as criminal as feeling the cancer patient, but it's still letting the patient take over. I'm going to forgive myself the slide for now though, 'cuz I feel like shit!